A few dry jokes...

1. A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal. Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."
2. There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
3. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any.
4. When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life, but I don't want one of them for my husband".
5. "My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance. We'll see about that."
6. I once called the phone company, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller", they said "Not you again".
7. I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.
8. A pair of jumper cables walks into a bar. The barman says "I'll serve you, but don't start anything"